After many rejections, in a cynical ploy,

After many rejections, in a cynical ploy, this time he sent poems from famous poets which he'd run back and forth between online english and russian translators a few times

and, to his surprise, found that the judges were impressed by his "effective parody of popular views on capitalism in post-industrial soviet russia." He suddenly found himself in

Venezuela. Which is an odd place to find yourself, especially without any memory of how you got there. But it was okay, because he still most of his teeth, not counting the ones

dangling from his gums, attached by the root. There would be time enough to sort those later, but for now Secret Agent Michael Scarn had an explosive turtle to stop.

Explosive turtles had become quite the nuisance since that episode of "Breaking Bad". The dentist could wait until he deactivated these. Still, he didn't want to miss

piggy the whole thing by falling in love with dynamic green amphibians. The dentists decided making turtles was dumb his new plan was to mold the c-4 explosive into molars and

prophylactics, because the dentists loved to do bridges on people missing half a jaw and hated looking in the mouths of children, thinking about all the

A spin-off of her popular "Favorite Things" list, "Damnedest Things" was a microcosm of Oprah's plunge into the dark side. Such damnedest things included sin, the Shake Weight, and

DJ's yelling ReeeeMiiix!!! I'll be damned if O didn't get stupid crunk on the dance floor. Jiggy I tell ya. Good TV, just real real good.