Question: Are nobles born with fancy hats
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Question: Are nobles born with fancy hats and scepters in tow? I am but a denizen of Plebeshire, but I wonder what makes nobles so special. My son was born with a hat-shaped growth
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on the top of his head & a scepter-shaped growth coming out of his hand. What's more, a silver spoon appeared on our step the night of his birth. We think he's a Plebeshire noble!
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The dish had run away with the silver spoon. They wanted to know if they could stay with us. I felt very uncomfortable with letting these paramours set at our table. Scandal
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, the smell of it, clung to them. BANG BANG BANG. It was the cow at the door. "I know you're in there," she lowed. The dish and spoon cowered under the table. I took a deep breath
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Was this really happening? I felt like I was trapped in a cartoon. But the cow knocking at the door was real. I looked around for something to defend myself with. A big, sharp
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Kitchen knife. Perfect. The cow's knocks got louder and louder, so loud I couldn't hear myself think. I ran upstairs, and closed the door. I sat on the floor, thinking
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about the maxim "just do it." The cow kept banging. I tied a rope to my plush bunny toy and duct taped the knife to his paw. I lowered it out the window to hover above the cow.
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Pulling the rope, I can move the toy so the knife cuts the cow's leash. The freed cow runs through the barn door, which tilts the ladder to the barn loft, and I'm free! McCowver!!!
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Stupid cow. It played right into my hand, did exactly what I wanted. Now it's time for a little revenge, I was afraid of heights and those who stuck me in the hay loft would
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want me to be happy. Sometimes parenting was hard, and my family's dynamics probably made Ma and Pa's jobs extra tough. So I chose to forgive everything, marry the cow, and be ok.
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- Started
- 2013-11-20 12:41:08
- Finished
- 2015-12-05 22:03:14
4 Comments
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Gibber Dec 05 2015 @ 23:17
My fold is based on a true story: Once one of my roommates brought home a huge plush bunny they had found on the street. Everyone thought it was creepy, so for decoration I duct taped a butter knife to its paw and set it out on the fire escape, malevolently peering in the window. One day a drunk was laying on our front porch and making a commotion. Someone came up with the wonderful idea of tying a rope to the bunny and lowering it down from the 2nd story window to hover above him. "What kinda nurse are you?" he shouted, "so goddamned big!" and then he went away.
grok Dec 06 2015 @ 05:11
Never would've thought the McGyver stuff works in real life! :D You got a photo of that thing for your profile picture?
Gibber Dec 06 2015 @ 12:22
No photo, that was back in the days of film cameras. However, I do have a drawing I did of a bunny with a butter knife spreading velveeta on white bread.
SlimWhitman Dec 06 2015 @ 13:47
It's great getting some true stories like this in foldingstory. Thanks for sharing it Gibber. I once rescued an oversized bunny hanging from a noose in the office next door. It's become our office mascot. Hasn't been mistaken for a nurse by any drunks yet.