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The Mandible of the Apocalypse was forlorn.

  • The Mandible of the Apocalypse was forlorn. It lacked a soul-mate with which to conduct appropriate mandibular activities. The Mandible gnashed silently. The gears of the metacosm
  • churned out The Cranium of Genesis as a divine gift. "She's a tad hardheaded," jawed the Mandible, "But she'll have to do." Together, they formed the Skull of Climax, protectors of
  • He Man's credit score. Man E Arms had too many credit cards because Teila was an emotional shopper. Skeletor had just come up with a new platinum card program
  • and pre-issued credit cards to cats, toddlers and the deceased. Somehow the debt got traced to living relatives with no knowledge. That's how American credit and banking work.
  • The relatives did not take kindly to the news, so they conspired to form a plan to bring down 'the man'. if only they could get their hands on a shark
  • who could read braille. That would show them. See, they wanted to 'blindside' the man. Get it? Oh, I crack me up. So anyway, the plan went as follows: The shark would
  • circle the man, showing dorsal fin. The man, panicking, grabbed by a melange of hermit crabs and prawns would be dragged to the giant clam's cave as an offering. What could go wron
  • g would go wrong, however. The shark, excited by the man's thrashing movements, tore off his legs with a single chomp. Now he would be only a half an offering to the giant clam.
  • The shark was unhappy about the fact his dinner was a man and not a tasty seal. The shark complained to the giant clam that the man had deceived him & ruined his seal only diet
  • but the clam said nothing. Clams are notoriously shellfish about sharing their opinions. The shark turned to the mathematical mermaid who wore an algae-bra and lamented,
Started
2011-07-19 19:59:31
Finished
2013-03-19 22:32:28

4 Comments

  1. Avatar

    PurpleProf Mar 19 2013 @ 22:37

    "I'll bite. How should we end this story?" :)
  2. Avatar

    KieferSkunk Mar 20 2013 @ 00:13

    "I am less than zero! My life equates to nothing! I am the lowest common denominator!" The mathematical mermaid just looked at the shark with her cold, calculating eyes. "Yeah, that about sums it up."
  3. Avatar

    PurpleProf Mar 20 2013 @ 00:16

    I like it, kieferskunk!
  4. Avatar

    BlastedHeath Mar 22 2013 @ 21:31

    yep!

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