Truth be told, he had not expected to have

Truth be told, he had not expected to have been accepted into the experiment. The line outside the door had been long. Somehow, he had gotten himself noticed, perhaps by

wearing the chicken suit his father had used on Let's Make a Deal. They were paying $300 to get injected with Bird Flu vaccine. Dennis needed that Three Large. So wearing the suit

Dennis eased out of the mini-van, careful that his rooster top didn't catch on the roof. So careful, in fact, that he didn't notice the great big puddle of oil

in the spot next to him. He absently flicked his lit cigarette into the puddle and it flared up like napalm. He tried to casually walk away, but how inconspicuous can you be with a

n enflamed backend not even a medicated wipe could put out. The smoker then lit a new cigarette, blowing smoke up

into the detector which set off a chain reaction with the fire extinguishers, the PA system, someone's iPod and a nurse who'd forgotten her bra that resulted in an impromptu wet

tee shirt contest by the vending machines. I told a third grader that there was a pool on the roof and laughed quietly as he raced up the stairs towards his impending

death. The principle kept "Magnus" his pit bull up there. The 3rd grader saw the dog who was licking himself. "Puppy!" he shouted as the dog lunged at him. It gripped his throat

and ripped his esophagus out of his throat. Then the principle entered the room shrieking "what did you do?" As the kid let out a weak "ahhhhh!" The the principle