The Squid children rolled on the floor laughing.

  • The Squid children rolled on the floor laughing. "That's the dumbest story you ever told! You're teasing us!" Giant Old Squid Man's eyes twinkled again."OK, let me tell you another

  • one for you to laugh at. This was long ago, back when I was just Giant Squid Man. I was in the north Pacific & I came upon the King of Herrings. Now, he's actually a giant oarfish.

  • Ugly as a barnacle too, & vain as he is long - a fathom in all, hence the lofty title. I flexed my Giant Squid Man tentancles trying to impress The King of Herrings, but bony fish

  • ignore molluscs. The King of Herring sat there on his throne in the drowned city of Ys with his morgen wife beside him. Now SHE found a Giant Squid Man like me fascinating. She put

  • her knife into my chest and I gasped, screaming in agony. Then I realized she was just offering me a banana and I took it with my tentacles, blushing. I unpeeled the banana but

  • at that very moment, a banana fish zipped past & plucked it from my 7th tentacle. It was a perfect day for banana fish, but I was angry! "I may be a lowly cephalopod, but you can't

  • change colors to communicate like I can!" I, middle-aged Squidman shot my 8th tentacle out, caught the banana fish and brought him toward my shiny, evil, soul crushing beak.

  • "I love that colour you're wearing, though." I whispered. Even as a middle-aged Squidman I could appreciate tasteful colour-matching when I saw it. "What is it, electric yellow?"

  • "These old things?" The squidess drawled. "It's lemon chiffon actually." Squidman was stumped. He'd never seen that shade of yellow. Especially on interstellar gator-skin boots.

  • That was the very color of his hide. Nevertheless,courtship etiquette prevailed. "Marvelous!" he exclaimed, as his sex organ quietly & courteously detached itself in her direction.



  1. zxvasdf Jan 25 2015 @ 10:10

    What a horrific ending to a children's story. I'd just discovered that certain cephalopods eject or attach their sex organs to the female who then tears it apart to get to the sperm as the male swims away to die. I must remedy this unfortunate course of events. "And that is how you little ones came to be!" Squidman said indulgently. "Shouldn't you be dead?" a squidling asked. "Yeah! Cuz mama sez daddy's dead." "No, she said he's a deadbeat!" "What's the difference? Dead is dead." "Children, children," old man Squid drawled. "You're certainly right about dead being dead." Mama Squid spurted into the flurry of squidlings, querying with much consternation, "With whom were you speaking?"

  2. SlimWhitman Jan 25 2015 @ 10:39

    Nice extended ending! The lore of giant old Squidman, and select cephalopods detachable sex organ drifts among the folds of Foldingstory like so many Chromodoris reticulata...

  3. earthquakes Jan 25 2015 @ 14:45

    I must 'fess up - those boots are from a teeny bopper song.

  4. lucielucie Jan 25 2015 @ 17:05

    Cephalapods' detachable penises (penii?) is a recurring worry amongst the FS community...

  5. zxvasdf Jan 25 2015 @ 20:58

    Being a relatively new newcomer to foldingstory, I am gratified to have unconsciously touched upon an issue that is evidently of great import to this community. I am determined to include a discussion of this matter in as many folds as possible, to alleviate worry by virtue of encompassing, accretive knowledge, and, failing that, by rendering the subject matter prosaic by a flux of exposure. Now picture this... there are upwards of a hundred octopi (this leads me to believe penii is the correct term), half of which are more or so male, all of whom happens to find precisely (I must not be using this word correctly) two or three of the females attractive. Their penii detach, suckers palpitating, and propel across the brine.

  6. zxvasdf Jan 25 2015 @ 20:59

    btw, earthquakes, any source of inspiration is gold, even if it's a shade lemon chiffon.

  7. PurpleProf Jan 26 2015 @ 12:46

    This story is a continuation of THIS one: http://foldingstory.com/oppuu/oppuu/

  8. PurpleProf Jan 26 2015 @ 12:47

    ...which was a continuation of THIS one: http://foldingstory.com/7j3qu/lhm48d/

  9. PurpleProf Jan 26 2015 @ 12:57

    May as well keep it rolling: http://foldingstory.com/hc53g/

  10. earthquakes Jan 26 2015 @ 22:21

    @z Dayum straight! :)

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