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Once upon a time, there lived an old woman

  • Once upon a time, there lived an old woman and 10 dogs.

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  • When she was a young witch she kept 9 frogs.

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  • Two years later she kept 7 logs. Three of the frogs from her earlier days she found trustworthy, but the others she had to dismiss after the oubliette incident, and the

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  • memory of it corroded her soul like acid dripping on a bar of pig iron. She kept her frog logs up to date, scratching in crabbed writing on curled parchment. Even her 3 loyal frogs

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  • were laying it on pretty thick. She fiddled with the wart on her nose. The moon would be full and she'd be tearing it up brookstick and all. What she needed was a dwarf.

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  • She dialed the number for Dwarfs on Demand, still rubbing her greenly glowing nose wart, waiting for someone to pick up. Witches, am I right fellas? Finally, someone answered,

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  • or so she thought. But then the witch heard "Hi ho hi ho. we'll hire for some dough. We're short and stout, but carry clout... Press 1 if you'd like a princess protected, 2 if you

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  • Want to speak to pirates in the carribean, 3 if you 'd like a prince protected, 4 if you are destitute and homeless, 5 if you are simply broke and hungry,

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  • 6 for removAl of your 3rd eye, 7 if you want your life jump started, 8 to not do whatever this one does, 9 to go to the next one, 1111 Shakira, Shakira.

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  • 12 I'm going for an even dozen, 13 make that a baker's dozen, 14 Whoops, too many, let me put one back, 13 uh-oh that's a hoo-doo number- go back one, 12 Angry men, 11 It goes to

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2 Comments

  1. Woab Aug 23 2016 @ 10:25

    See, it goes to 11. 'Cos that's one ...more.

  2. earthquakes Aug 23 2016 @ 11:04

    This one was goodly

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