Becca snuck into her ex's house every night,

Becca snuck into her ex's house every night, only stealing what she could fit in her bindle. Tonight, she sought his heirloom: the remote control. Stealth ops were required because

"Creeper! Creeper! Squawk! Squawkers want a cracker!" the parrot was out of control w/anger, I was petrified that they would wake up, and I would be caught redhanded w/the remote.

So I aimed the remote at him and pressed the "mute" button. Squawkers' eyes widened as his mouth opened & closed. But not another peep emitted from Squawkers' beak.

Just as I thought. This was not the real Squawkers but the Squawkers Cyborg. The S.C. craned its head and said, "Polly want a cracked SKULL!" It launched itself at my head.

As I batted it away I surmised it must have some sort of x-ray vision that allowed it to see that my skull was, in fact, cracked. This was no run of the mill cyborg. I trapped it

by pulling a battery across the floor on an invisible string. "Damn my x-ray eyes!" the cyborg cried from under the barrel I had trapped it under, "they didn't detect that string!"

"That's because its a superstring ideal for capturing superman cyborgs like you." I answered, "and the barrel is lined with kryptonite to keep you weak." The cyborg wore the barrel

Like body armour and ran around scaring humans to death. But, because it was a cyborg, the police were helpless. They too dropped dead, like flies in a sticky trap. Black goo was

the color of me true love's hair -- my last thought as I sunk under, finally satisfied my cyborg scheme had enacted my revenge. Black goo matters.