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He crept down into the feared basement. He

  • He crept down into the feared basement. He felt something... Or was it his imagination? What was that!? Shivers went down his spine as he turned and saw the most frightening thing:

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  • his parents, halfway out of their PJs, had snuck downstairs for a late night snog fest, and he'd unintentionally ambushed them. Ew!! Tommy tried to shield his eyes, but

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  • it really was too late. Tommy now understood more about sex than any child needs to know. The image of his parents on the couch was too much! A lifelong

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  • aversion to couches was now Tommy's legacy to those frightening images. No, never again could Tommy sit or even stand near a couch. It was just too painful.

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  • Tommy found it nearly impossible to avoid couches. He went to movie theaters 15 hours a day, rode the bus for three hours, walked on the beach for two hours, and slept in the

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  • gutter "for the experience". Mother was none too pleased. "How do you expect to get into Yale with those ideals of yours?" Tommy glowered. "I HATE Yale!" he screamed, pointing at

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  • Harvard. "Uh Tommy, that's not Yale, that's Harvard." His mother said diffidently. Tommy looked at his finger that was pointing. Stared at the tip of it. Something brown was at

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  • His fingertips, as his nephew went to Brown University. He got a masters in psychobiology which he never used, but became an expert on mushrooms. He knew Aldous Huxley and friends.

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  • and repudiated them all at every opportunity he was given. All that simply because his father had been one of the first to reconcile with Darwin's theory about evolution being that

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  • humans had evolved to have backwards tails. That is why men have belly buttons because they were all once women. But with backwards tails males had begun. My father was a genius.

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1 Comments

  1. Rebbie Jan 17 2017 @ 12:10

    it was supposed to say *nipples. That's what happens when the phone interrupts you ... you go mad.

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