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My Aunt Martha had terrible breath. But how

  • My Aunt Martha had terrible breath. But how could I tell her when I knew full well that she was leaving me 2.3 million dollars in her will? Keeping my eyes fixed on her pock-marke

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  • d make-up & holding a tissue over my nose, I asked my rich Aunt to tell about the filming of the Wizard of Oz again. She said, "Well, my pretty. I was the Wicked Witch of the East

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  • Coast Rappers. My aunt cackled and flying monkeys started beat-boxing. Then the witch of the West Coast Rappers rolled up in an El Camino riding kilo G.

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  • "Yo!" The drug dealer cried out. "This ain't no bitch slapping night, yo'all!" He brandished his shimmering revolver at the flying monkeys who immediately stopped their reverie.

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  • "Meet my good buddy," the unhinged peddler of Molly and Molly knock-offs grumbled, "Mr. Luger." The flying monkeys looked puzzled. This was not the bar-mitzvah they had expected.

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  • The flying monkeys escaped and wrote a best selling memoir titled "Apeman" , after the Kinks song. Ray Davies watched with a smile.

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  • He was high as kite. Ray Davies wasn't sure how he felt about monkeys being so influenced by his music. They had even gone on to cover some of his tunes.

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  • The Caphuchin monkeys did a cover of A Gallon of Gas from Low Budget. It lingered a few weeks and then flashed to the top when influential people began quoting the cover in the ha

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  • -ute couture fashion shows. Yves Saint-Laurent hired the Caphuchin monkeys to play at his Fall show, but they showed up completely blitzed and hurled all over the catwalk.

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  • Not to worry though since he based his spring line up on the colors found in said vomit. You know how high fashion is, shock factor meets nothing you'd ever really wear.

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1 Comments

  1. Woab May 08 2017 @ 17:11

    I would imagine that earth tones in a spring show would cause quite a ripple of outrage in the world of high fashion. Shocking, really.

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