Philip Alston, an official with the United

Philip Alston, an official with the United Nations is decrying a Nigerian court decision to sentence a 50-year-old man to death by stoning after he admitted to having

sweet relations with his clone. The questions surfaced as to whether this was incest, illegal homosexual behavior, or masturbation. The jury, like his cells, were divided.

And so, with a hung jury, he was free from the barbaric call of "justice." In celebration, he headed home with his clone and they rejoiced in one another's arms in bliss.

They entered the clam shell tub and the clone sputtered and hissed. It was water resistant not water proof. "Damn," he thought. Then the clone spoke like stroked out Kirk Douglas

chimney while the real Spartacus entered the arena. You could tell he was genuine because he could stand upright and wasn't drooling. The other gladiators didn't notice

the difference, as they were all background low quality stunt-doubles hired by the hour and didn't really have any significance whatsoever. All they had to do was

stand in the background unnoticeably while all the attention was focused on Cowboy TV! Just like in real life! In this scene, Cowboy TV

was forgotten. The acqua alta continued to rise until it filled St Mark's Square. The Doge sat in his residence, making plans. What this town needs, he thought, is a flume ride.

He gathered all the gondoliers and human statues and laid his grand plans before them. Modern Venice, or "VeniceWorld" as it is now known, had finally come to fruition.