Luckily it was Reverso Day so he was given

Luckily it was Reverso Day so he was given an extra 20 years of life & a warning. "Never tell someone to break a leg on Literal Day again please." Unfortunately it was also

Sloppy Opposite Day, sponsored by Manwich, maker of Manwich Misunderstandings, the wacky game of confusing commands and tomato-based stains! The parade began promptly at 10::13,

so i needed to hurry, my Manwich costume was still at my house. I dashed through the streets filled with people setting up for the parade, but when I reached my door

I heard voices. Voice #1: "Here's the buns. Where's the beef?" Voice #2: "Keep looking!" I knew then what was at stake. I could call the cops or stay & defend my Manwich costume.

I decided to add some lettuce to my costume. Its almost Halloween and i cant find the beef!!!!

I found some duck tape and I made a stick figure on a pair of pants and a sweatshirt. I slipped it on and headed out the door. people laughed at me but i didnt know why.

Maybe it was because I had accidentally splattered 50 cans of tomato paste on my thigh. Don't judge.

once that he was actually hired by my boyfriend's arch nemesis to get dirt on him. Dammit! I really ought to keep more of a lid on his fetishes. The man smiled, then stood and left

his dinner half eaten. "Do you mind if I.." asked a randomer, gesturing towards the mashed potato. "Sure, go ahead." "Damn this mash is tasty..." he said.