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Jay drew a penis in the signature box of

  • Jay drew a penis in the signature box of an application to change his registered address. A dick in a box, get it?

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  • Montague Jacques considered the rather rude graffiti on the application and considered the potential malleability of the applicant. But the position required

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  • both wit and a command of sexual puns. "He could be a fool," Montague Jaques muttered, "or a savant. Schedule an interview." Jay came in the next day, wearing cargo shorts and

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  • a polka dot jacket. Jay clearly did not understand job interview etiquette 101. Montague Jacques sighed once he saw this fashion disaster. "Clearly, there is room for improvement."

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  • "Hm?""You can't wear polka dots with stripes! Are you serious about this job or joining the circus?" Jay just hoped Montague, the interviewer, didn't look down at his clown shoes.

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  • Montague suddenly looked down at his shoes. "Those shoes! Are those...clown shoes?" Jay had a sudden urge to stab Montague in the eye with his pen, but instead, he handed him a

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  • summons to appear in Clown Court. "Yes, these are clown shoes YOU IDIOT!" Jay honked his red ball nose and flipped Montague the bird before storming off down the walkway. Montague

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  • yelled for the bailiff. "Seltzer that man!" Jay was sprayed and hauled back to the witness stand. Montague held a whipped cream pie before him. "Exhibit B. Look familiar buffoon?"

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  • Jay's jaw came to a sudden drop "That pie was the instigator in all of this tomfoolery", Jay shouted. "It told me that nobody else could see it, it's a liar!". The jury

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  • was of the runaway variety. The young, idealistic lawyer exposed the corporate conspiracy. Convictions were overturned and the heated air of exoneration baked that pie. To Victory!

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