Almost as soon as BONE LOSS by Heather Mandibles

Almost as soon as BONE LOSS by Heather Mandibles hit the best-seller lists, it was pulled from the shelves. Too many readers were being found dead in bed, with their bones missing.

It was part of the Avian Bird Flu part II, The Bonelessness. People caught the disease by

praising their outdoor cats for bringing home a dead bird. As their most pliant humans fell to the virus the cats had to act.

And they acted with the plain disdain and lack of mercy that characterized their species. The Feline Council was not going to take any measures to save the humans, so they

could bally well stuff it, by jove, don't you know. Those smitten kittens had strung them along with their digressing yarns for so long, we forgot why we needed the Feline Council

of Kabalism, Economic Discourse, Ungratefulness and Politics (FCKEDUP). The Feline Council decided enough was enough. FCKEDUP kittens were wasting far too much time playing with

Mice that had long since lost their fresh catnip smell. It was time to donate those mice to Goodwill and buy a bulk pack of new toy mice, including those that squeaked. There was a

n eerie feeling occupied by perfect silence as I thought, "What if IT cannot wait for the new bulk shipment. Will IT take me instead?"

I gathered some junk and stacked it as high as I could, trying my best not to alarm IT. The new shipment wouldn't arrive soon and I wasn't going to wait until IT decided