I was sitting across the aisle & saw the

I was sitting across the aisle & saw the whole thing. My hero Jackie Chan (on my flight!) had a bit much to drink & got irate when the lummox in front of him leaned his seat back

to give birth to a live, 9-pound elk. The elk then stood up on the plane, shook off the placental fluid, aged about 20 years in 10s & delivered the last funny standup routine ever.

their children, spades after their dogs, hearts and diamonds after their favorite TV shows, and they like to name each individual bingo chip after the Dalai Lama. Don't ask me why

she swallowed the fly, I guess she'll die." Announced Dr. Menkold. Then he put down the children's book he was reading to the comatose patient. "Doctor?"

Odelia asked. "Was that Doctor Suess?" Dr. Menkold hadn't even looked at the cover. He just randomly found the book.

In the sense that he had randomly been in the children's section of the library again. Dr. Menkold read the title of the book, "Horton Hears a Hookah."

Dr. Menkold had thought the titles in the library's children's section were a bit off "See Spot Chug"? "Dick and Mary Jane"? "The Whippet in the Willows"?? "Scruff McGruff needs

Snuff"? Children's literature hadn't changed a bit since Dr. Menkold was a kid. Long live the precocious youth of every generation, he mused to himself. "Indeed," drawled a girl by

the name of Betty. "Finally" Said Dr. Menkoid. "Someone understands!" He turned to face this girl and discovered that she was no other than his dead cat. She meowed. He did too.