"Ack! Save... yourselves," the cavalryman

"Ack! Save... yourselves," the cavalryman pled as he coughed up blood. "Oh no, he has bronchitis," said the sage, ignoring the cavalryman's case of "throat sword." Further tests

revealed a sword in the cavalryman's neck, but the sage said its presence was unrelated to the bronchitis. "A nasty epidemic," he said, and told the villagers to quarantine themsel

ves immediately. Well, except for the farmer's daughter. She was to change into a serving wench's outfit, stop by the pub for two large barrels of mead and meet the Sage behind

the sagebush. The sage's rendezvous place with the farmer's daughter was less than sagacious for Farmer Joe used the sagebush as a naturally sanitized outhouse.

To make things more normal, the farmer's daughter (we'll call her Ora) nicknamed him "Bob Saget." Bob Saget loved Ora, but was tired of her father always literally pissing on him.

After this nasty business was wrapped up Bob Saget and Ora struck out for Los Angeles to seek fame and fortune together. They rented a studio apartment in North Hollywood near

The sinkhole that formed afte the 6.0 earthquake. They were very careful to avoid the sinkhole but the sinkhole kept growing and growing until it engulfed their house. Then they

accepted their new life underground. Sure things were hard but nothing a good pickaxe couldn't break through. And besides, those pesky neighbors were no longer an issue, with their

knock-down drag-out fights keeping them up all night long. The pickaxe had taken care of them, too. All that was behind them, now that they lived underground with the moles.