Warning Fuckitall May cause a blasé attitude

Warning Fuckitall May cause a blasé attitude towards normal daily tasks like Eating, Wiping your ass, Keeping the wheels pointing down on your car, and telling your the Judge No

Also, it may cause unwanted pregnancies and severe carpal-tunnel like syndromes. And it cost only $9.99!!!! That's as cheap as a box of

blank high school diplomas. I should know because I bought a box. Instead of actually going to that warped little institution I watched 18 years of TV and gave myself a diploma

I was so intent on watching TV for 18 years that I never noticed that my house had been knocked down and turned into a brunch buffet. Good thing they had thought to feed me.

but really they never had an attention to feed me for i was a poor peasent girl with beatiful brown hair long strong legs and a nice body for i was a ......

...what, exactly? I suddenly realized I had lived my entire life without a moment of self-reflection. Why was my hair so long? Why was I sad? Why were there cameras in my cell?

A padded cell did allow me to have some "me" time. I could get my goals all sorted out. Number one on the agenda was how can I scratch my nose in a strait-jacket? Two: Lunch.

Okay, maybe goals 1 & 2 were entwined. Lunch would be easier to eat, after all, if my arms weren't securely tied by the straight-jacket restraints. I grunted. Stupid lawyers, they

think they know everything. -Don't steal, Don't kill, Don't get caught.- Well, on that last one they were right. I continued to work on sawing through the straight jacket with

a trilobyte who had agreed to serve me. Then it clicked: "Don't put your stinky foot on your friend's face". I did eventually regret that, for whatever regret is worth. *Sigh*