Warning Fuckitall May cause a blasé attitude

Warning Fuckitall May cause a blasé attitude towards normal daily tasks like Eating, Wiping your ass, Keeping the wheels pointing down on your car, and telling your the Judge No

blank high school diplomas. I should know because I bought a box. Instead of actually going to that warped little institution I watched 18 years of TV and gave myself a diploma

I was so intent on watching TV for 18 years that I never noticed that my house had been knocked down and turned into a brunch buffet. Good thing they had thought to feed me.

but really they never had an attention to feed me for i was a poor peasent girl with beatiful brown hair long strong legs and a nice body for i was a ......

...what, exactly? I suddenly realized I had lived my entire life without a moment of self-reflection. Why was my hair so long? Why was I sad? Why were there cameras in my cell?

A padded cell did allow me to have some "me" time. I could get my goals all sorted out. Number one on the agenda was how can I scratch my nose in a strait-jacket? Two: Lunch.

Okay, maybe goals 1 & 2 were entwined. Lunch would be easier to eat, after all, if my arms weren't securely tied by the straight-jacket restraints. I grunted. Stupid lawyers, they

think they know everything. -Don't steal, Don't kill, Don't get caught.- Well, on that last one they were right. I continued to work on sawing through the straight jacket with

a trilobyte who had agreed to serve me. Then it clicked: "Don't put your stinky foot on your friend's face". I did eventually regret that, for whatever regret is worth. *Sigh*