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"I don't know, I just hate how Apple has

  • "I don't know, I just hate how Apple has sort of, become cool." The squirrel stared at the cat. The cat said, "What's wrong with cool?" The squirrel twitched, "Nerds aren't suppose

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  • to be cool. Only Alice is cool. She defeated the Dragon of the Queen of Hearts and she slayed him while yelling "off with your head!" The sly cat recalled to the squirrel. Squirrel

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  • thought the cat was nuts and ate the cat, saying, "That was the best tasting..." but before squirrel could finish the sentence, Alice

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  • struck it rather hard in the head with what looked like an oversized pencil, with had already been broken in two by the cat which had just been eaten. Alice then told the squirrel

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  • "look, its like this. I cook it, you sell it. You cut it, you're out. You don't sell enough, you're out. You shoot it, smoke it, whatever, you're out." The squirrel looked at Alice

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  • 's contract. See here? She pointed. I don't care if the toadstool is a magic mushroom and your high as a kite. You're in violation!" The squirrel ruffled it's tail & pointed at the

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  • small print section. "…may share your data with any 3rd party… What's that got to do–" but when she took off her reading glasses, the squirrel was gone, as were all the mushrooms.

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  • "Well, don't that beat all," she murmured to herself. "I could have sworn... MARGARET! Did you notice a squirrel here on my desk a moment ago?" Margaret peered over the cubicle,

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  • her glasses askew and her wild hair frizzing up from the office's humidity. "No, darling, I think not. Why, though, would you ask such a queer question?"

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  • "I was just curious." I explained, "But your answer told me all I needed to know." So I packed my bags and left, never to be seen again.

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