I gazed through the blinders hanging before

I gazed through the blinders hanging before the train window at the moire pattern formed by the neat rows of rice plants. We passed a crossing and the warning tone doppler-shifted

was running...man! And then the lights came up, Richard Dawkins cackled. A fat man coated in lights came running at me singing opera, and I had to get to the chopper so I

elbowed the opera-singing Dawkins off the roof and as he fell he couldn't resist ranting about this or that like an angry teenager on her Failbook page. I got on the chopper and

quickly positioned it where Mr.Dawkins was going to hit. The sound of his ranting dismembered body was only muffled by the spinning blades. I was a hero. There was a God.

But what has God to do with this?

Somewhere between very little and nearly everything, depending on whether or not God actually exists, and just what exactly, THIS is. "What is this?" said a voice from the back.

"it's my powerpoint presentation for the answers to life. Next bullet point please. As you can see God is.. Oh dear..." The Blue Screen of Death covered the IMAX wall. People left

cookie crumbs and coffee cups under their chairs in the lecture hall, and were shot dead for their lack of consideration. Implacably, the speaker said, "Next slide, please."

The next slide showed a picture of the cookie crumbs and coffee cups with a red "no" symbol over it, serving as a warning to future students to clean up after themselves or else.