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My neighbor's dog was always howling at the

  • My neighbor's dog was always howling at the moon. All night, all I could hear was that bloody howling. I needed to do something, but what? It was such a

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  • pleasure, that howling, so primal and beautiful. I knew I must record it. As I climbed over the dividing fence, mini recorder in hand, I had to stop and think:

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  • Would my neighbors understand me recording the beautiful howls of their lovemaking for posterity? I dismissed it. Art is art. As I drew near their window, I tripped over Mr. Chen

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  • The perv of the cull de sac. His motives for looking in the window were prurient. Mine artistic. Yet we found ourselves looking - peeping in his case - in the same windows all the

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  • friggin' time. It was annoying, so the "pervert" decided to make a chart so that we would never be at the same window at the same time. I was an artist, so I wore a smock and he

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  • had leggings and a shower curtain and a greased Chicken breast tied with blue twine. Oh, if the neighbors goat was just 4 feet closer this would be providence.

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  • The goat came running over to eat the shower curtain but tripped on the blue twine.Two big pigs came over to get on the action

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  • but the crocodiles had already farted and headed to the eastern seaboard for some mild time travel.Bob was scared of the future lovers he would encounter because of tooth enamel

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  • eroded from years of drinking soda sweetened with high-fructose corn syrup. The decay coupled with chronic halitosis meant

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  • for a happy dentist who would take a few shots of nitros himself before attacking the mess in his patients mouth.

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