She walked on the curb of the sidewalk,
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She walked on the curb of the sidewalk, a package in one hand and her keys in the other. No one would have ever suspected that she could be the one.
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But she, alone, was the chosen one. She was the one that had to save the day. She had to export the very expensive swiss cheese to the ultralord.
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It wasn't until puffin burgers appeared on the menu that she had her chance to defeat the ultralord. The swiss cheese was just a ruse to get the ultralord in a chess tournament at
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some dark hour when most people are sleeping or drunk or both. She could then smother the ultraloard with the evil pillow with LCD crystals in the
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top drawer, dispensed by a lever on the bed side. The perfect placement may be a retirement center. Those glaucoma blind spots really mess with hallucinogenic trips. She would have
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to fill in liberally with addled companions of her dementia. Dr. Jeremy Hilary Boob popped his head up through one of her blind spots and advised
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Her to let Dr. Jeremy carry her into the van. She refused and instead fell down for all to see. Even more embartassing, she had hiccups. Dr. Jeremy carried Perrier just in case she
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Ever consented to be his wife but Perrier insisted she never would and for him to put her down "this very damned moment" or he would find out how very effervescent she could be.
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Perrier was like champagne. Sparkling and tasty, but just try to get to her and she blows her top and explodes all over everything. And the next morning you'll find her pounding
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your brain from the inside out. "I told you not to do it! I TOLD YOU! Didn't I tell you??" she screeches over & over again...until you burp. And then it is over.
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- Started
- 2012-11-14 09:35:02
- Finished
- 2017-05-11 22:07:57
4 Comments
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LordVacuity May 11 2017 @ 22:50
That is pretty effervescent in my book. Or more like that is what it was the last time my book and I saw each other on that mountain peak that one crazy afternoon in winter. A man and his book, warm and cozy inside an ice weather tent. Keeping each other's backsides warm by friction.
LordVacuity May 11 2017 @ 22:53
It must have been some easily ignited book binding or adhesive. Either way, the book ignited into flames and released the demon that friction created.
LordVacuity May 11 2017 @ 22:56
But that turned out to be unwieldy so everybody agreed upon Demon Friction. You say Father, I say Demon. Same difference.
Woab May 12 2017 @ 10:31
I wonder if Inatick was referring to Eugene Puffinburger, a guy who used to write the crossword puzzles for The Washington Post. His crosswords were very clever and often stumped me. "Puffinburger!" I would cry, stumped, and then would doodle an exploding hamburger in the margins.