"We mustn't tell anyone, this would cause

"We mustn't tell anyone, this would cause a world wide panic!" Those were the last words I heard before I accidentally hit "Send to everyone."

We gasped in horror as the mass email containing a pic of Pooh Bear, shirtless, circulated globally . "Can't you recall it?" "This isn't the Bush Gore election." I rolled my eyes.

"Pooh, what happened to the loveable Bear of very little brain?" I asked. "I got dumped by the punk kid and decided to grow up myself. Say, You got smack? My honeypots all out."

"Sorry, I'm all out." My childhood memories would never be the same. "Hey, Eeyore...why so glum?" "I'm not depressed - just really, really, mellow," he said and took a deep drag

off his hand rolled cigarette. "You do look mellow, or something," I said. Eeyore wore a beret & rectangular sunglasses, and had a goatee. He was even walking on his hind legs.

"You're wrong," said Eeyore gloomily. "We can't all & some of us don't. That's all there is to it. I don't do mellow." He then wandered to his thistle patch to stand in the rain.

It began to thunder and Eeyore began to worry. But he couldn't be bothered to move from where he stood by his thistle patch. He was, unsurprisingly, struck by lightning, which caus

with a little less spring in his step. Kanga. Well Kanga was hopping mad and hopped off into the outback upon hearing the news. She's probably at the bar. Dundee is another story.

He moved to Scotland and married a nice lady and now breeds Scottish Terriers. He never speaks of his days down under, but sometimes you can see the vast outback there in his eyes.