There is not one day when she couldn't remember

There is not one day when she couldn't remember the harassment she endured. She remembers all the awful things they said to her, and how everyone just stood around and laughed.

How could they be so cruel and not think a thing of the pain they inflicted on her?

Of course she would be upset when her supposedly best friends didn't care to mention that they had been murdering her pets for the past year. Brutally mascaraing her kittens . . .

the dead kittens were an hommage to her personality. Her best friends had wanted to do something tragic but real, so they killed her kittens. All her kittens. Her friends were dogs

in every sense of the word. Female dogs. If you know what I mean. She stood staring at the sad picture - 147 kittens arranged into the image of Andy Warhol. "Well, thanks, I guess.

At least this is better than the present from my dad." She said, referring to the fancy fruitbasket which, being a stickler for organisation, he had purchased a month in advance.

Yet her dad hadn't realized she couldn't eat bananas, berries, apples or pears. That left just a single orange. She reused the ribbon and cellophane wrap from the fruit basket for

she could lure the cat down to safety, for this cat was no ordinary cat. Its was SouperApple! The apple eater whose only weakness was gravity, and brevity!

But alas, her fame was also grave and brief, for SouperApple had reached her ninth life and eaten the rest of the poisoned apple left by Snow White. No-one tells this part.