Since I've had a moustache and glasses drawn

Since I've had a moustache and glasses drawn on my face with an indelible Sharpie, women are drawn irresistibly to me. Or is it the Lynx?

It must be that, and I'm not talking about my cat. See, I paid attention to those ads, and it's like they suggest. Buy their products and you will get lucky.

Actually my cat was the one who got lucky. Now I was the proud mother of a litter of mueling kittens. 'My cat' is a euphemism for that fly by night deadbeat tom Kinsky Miawrinsky

who seemed to always be crawling around on the ground licking random objects and hissing at passing pedestrians as if he, Kinsky Miawrinsky, was some sort of human-feline

but that didn't bother Calvin, because he knew that no one could understand his feelings, for he had only one true friend "Hobbes" and they continued working on their club GROSS.

(Get Rid Of Slimy girlS) Calvin set up a portfolio and planned franchise opportunities with Hobbes. Suzy got wind and established DUMB (Determined to UnderMine Boys)

which Calvin knew she would do so he joined Suzy's Determined to UnderMine Boys club. In order to join he would have to blend in. Hobbes, a tiger, knew something about camoufl

age trends in the fashion industry. "No, no, no," he tutted Calvin. "The orange camo is only appropriate near volcanoes!" Calvin muttered as he replaced the uniform on the rack.

Those boots are so fucking great. I don't know why I ever thought about throwing them away. Oh, yes, I remember now: They stinks. I fucking step on that shit.