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Once upon a time. Before the earth was created.

  • Once upon a time. Before the earth was created. When everything simple and complex as 1 and 0.

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  • Out of the dark void a single light began to shine, faintly at first before, growing to be a searing point of brilliance out of which

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  • the angels flew. They were magnificent, glowing beings. He stood, feet apart, awaiting them. But they flew by, and it was clear that

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  • they were meant for the narrower-stanced gentleman immediately to his left. He stepped back as the angels swirled around the man, encapsulating him in light like

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  • a gentle whirlwind. He slowly looked down at his feet and was worried

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  • that the breeze would blow his scent in the wrong direction. After what he had been through, a stupid mistake like that may cost him his

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  • life. He paid no heed as fate decided to sprinkle him with misfortune. He kept gazing with a fierce intensity at

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  • the door to the candy shop, hoping that it would someday lead to gumdrop lake. But all it did was beckon to clean the tables of their sticky mess.

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  • "Come", said Willy Wonka (the creepy, Johnny Depp version), "we have such wonderful, creamy things to show you." The Oompa Loompa's were involved what appeared to be

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  • an orangy. Little bodies and giant heads singing a song about tainting the chocolate river, all naked from the waist down. Wonka snapped, covered them in milk, and drew his spoon.

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