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Once upon a time there was a middle school

  • Once upon a time there was a middle school teacher who lived in a magical land called Highlands. She was a magical teacher who was able to grant wishes.

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  • The magical wishes were magically granted by the magical teacher. The magical magics were noticed by the magic police, and they witch hunted the magical teacher. "Aha!" they cried

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  • when they discovered the magical teacher's hideout. The magical police then arrested the magical teacher and sent them to magical jail for illegally granting magical wishes.

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  • After ten months in the magical halfway house the magical police allowed the magical teacher to go back to school to earn a wish-granting license. But the teacher failed and was

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  • instead demoted to become a magical janitor.Unable to support himself with the merger salary,he turned to selling magical weed on the side.He's got bills to pay and kids to feed,so

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  • So he goes out and he makes his money the best way he knows how, another body laying cold in the gutter. Listen to me!

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  • He listened, but the only sound from the cold body was a drip from the last of the spring shower which was slowly filling the gutter. Suddenly the body

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  • just lay there like a dead body tends to do. It is the usual expectation upon walking into a murder scene investigation. We just don't usually notice the suddenly part of it. Det.

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  • Manatee, however, took nothing for granted. Waddling over to the body, Det. Manatee leaned down &...listened. Then he suddenly declared: "Just as I thought. This person is NOT DEAD

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  • !" "But Det. Manatee!," an onlooker protested, "he's been decapitated and shot 42 times in the crotch. There's his left nut right over there." "That's disgusting and gratuitous."

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1 Comments

  1. LordVacuity May 07 2019 @ 20:14

    The left nut is always the hardest case to crack.

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