The Magister Ludi tutted. "This is not the

The Magister Ludi tutted. "This is not the Glass Bead Game -- this is some kind of paintball that involves people splattering each other with references and dare I say apothegms!"

But Ted the Paintballer said, "You focus on the negative, because brains are hardwired to devote more attention to the misery in life." Magister Ludi double-tutted, "I say,

it's worth it. If you think of the misery in life, then when something good happens, it's more of a surprise." Ted stared at Magister Ludi, unable to comprehend what this odd man

Must have eaten to survive 274 years. Ted wanted to know how Magister Ludi stayed so healthy when the planet he came from became 2,376 small planets and shed no volcanic ash.

So Ted began his journey to get to Magister Ludi. First, he must go across the great deserts of the planet Tresed, and then across the space elevator to its moon. Then he would

seek the Eternal Abyss of Clythe and see himself become a momentary fragment and understand why everything that has been and what will be are only meaningful when you possess

. Gunter Grass. I punched him in the throat and told him that was a damned lie. I was no kraut author, I was a guy who poured asphalt for a living. But he danced about on my fresh

ly paved road despite the many warning signs that said “under construction”. Poor Gunter Grass, he’s now stuck to the pavement in his new leather boots.

Many squirrels, raccoons, and sticks that had also ignored the signs were stuck. Ever the promoter, he posted a sign, “La Brea Tar Pits East,” and made a mint charging admission.