But I was not! And I began to second guess

But I was not! And I began to second guess myself in regards to asking myself is this what I really want to do for the rest of my life? And my mind would tell me YES! So I stayed

and I listened for the One behind the scenes, the Emanator, without Whom there would be no worlds or ambition or doubt or limitation, expressive dance or dance invisible. But was t

hwarted by her inscrutable ubiquity.The Emanator was in the ten thousand things plying me with this house of mirrors called reality.It was when I stopped listening & turned inward

I quickly explained all to my boss- how I was losing it & might walk in one day & shoot all my co-workers. He was very soothing & pressed a red button he said would soon cure me of

neediness of blood and violence, which he himself experienced before. The painting of roasted penguins on the wall hit the ground with a DING-DONG. Behind it was a corridor and I

felt drawn to it as if pulled by an invisible cord. By the time I was through the painting and inside the hidden corridor, splashes of red paint covered me from head to toe. How

embarrassing it was when my mom entered the hidden corridor without warning and asked me if it was my time of the month again. "No mom, I'm just painting another crime scene for

The Onion 's article on Alice Cooper." She was amazed I knew if his imfamous song, "Only Women Bleed" from 1977's "Welcome to my nightmare" album. I hated the song and she did too.

Clearly we had much in common. This by far was the best blind date I'd ever been on!