Lance smeared smegma butter across Jill's

Lance smeared smegma butter across Jill's English muffin. Then he sat back and admired his work. Oh, how he loved the ladies from London. That, and a good game of football.

If only he could have both at once.... and that was how he came up with Ladies' Football. It didn't catch on at first, of course. But Lance was sure it would eventually. The girls

were ferociously competitive, he discovered, and could trash talk like he never heard before. The Ladies' Football League insisted on scantily-clad male cheerleaders & Lance

Armstrong's brother. Lance scowled at this. How dare they steal his brother? He would get him back if he died trying. He hopped on his bike and cycled towards the HQ.

His brother was being held for ransom and this was for providing steroids. The sports police were outraged at the thought of a world champion using steroids. His medals were stripp

ed off of him the same way he had stripped off the clothing of that poor, helpless teenage girl he was sex trafficking. His eyes widened at his recollection of her; they didn't kn

… the writer recoiled from the page, blood pouring from his eyes. He ran out into the torrential rain to cleanse his sins. But it was all for not. A portal of hellfire opened under

the bed. but George never realized what he was seeing. Later when he reconsidered the event of that evening, there may have been more to it. In reality the portal was

a gateway to the stairway to Heaven leading directly to Dimensional Reality 1371,

beautifully, I might add. Regardless, those heavenly stairs leading to 1371 were a hell of a climb but once I made it I got back all of my lost energy, as expected here. I did it.