Smoking weed is one of the best things I

Smoking weed is one of the best things I can do, but tonight

I thought I would try smoking coffee. I started with Hills Bros. but it wasn't giving me the morning buzz. Maybe if I added a depth charge and used Jamaican Blue...

That definitely had an effect but it was too mellow. I never made it off the couch & consumed an entire bag of cheesy poofs. So I went to 2 scoops of French roast in a corncob pipe

I had a feeling Brian had tainted the innocent blunt he had passed to me. Usually, I become paranoid thinking satan is going to kill me if he found out I smoked again. What had he

done? WHAT HAD HE DONE? Looking closer, I ripped off Brian's face, which was actually a mask. Behind it was a murderous salt shaker cyborg. "Exterminate, EXTERMINATE!" it screamed.

I jumped back and slipped on some oily shit that was coming our from under the salt shaker cyborg. I assumed it was an attack so I activated my defenses while I got clear of the th

Landmines left behind by its snot. Cyborgs were something I was only recently warned about. Robot cops appeared first on the streets of London. More reason to avoid blue lights.

But this was to my detriment, as it made me steer clear of the Blue Light specials at Kmart, and I missed out on many a deal on singing wall fish and 100% polyester sheets. So I

decided not to miss out & drove to my local Kmart…closed. I knew Kmart was closing stores, but not MY local Kmart! C’mon! I drove to another one I knew 20 miles away…also closed.

How in the heck was I to bask in the infamous glow of the Blue LIght Special?! Oh sh*t! I just saw someone I know. They mustn't see me here! ABORT PLAN! All KMART shoppers! ABORT!