One day in Costco, the shade of Constance

One day in Costco, the shade of Constance Garnett broached the subject of Matthew Dostoevsky's choice of breakfast nourishment. "Uncle," she began, "there are oranges in aisle 14 a

nd instant custard in the next row. What say you to a truly traditional morning meal?" Constance's uncle patted her pigtails and ushered her to the canned vegetables. "Now, darling

if you don't get off frandpa's back, he's going to smash you with these canned vegetables." Constance smiled, "You old ass. You can't scare me. I'm going to get you for what you di

d to those poor ants,you SOB...".The furious budist cried for a bit and since the old man kept staring in challenge,Constance decided to take action.

"Put that down!" He cried. The furious Buddhist levitated into the air, lifted his open hand and lo! There

therein lay a cricket. The cricket began to chirp the guitar solo from Bohemian Rhapsody. The levitating Buddhist seemed pleased but still furious. "Take that, you

fat-bottomed girl! I will not listen any longer! I want to ride my bicycle. I want to ride my bike." The Buddhist pedaled away, leaving the cricket perplexed. Dumfounded, in fact.

What does a lowly cricket know of the vows of a monk? The monk yelled "Don't stop me now!" but he had a heart attack & was dead on time. All was quiet except the chirping of a lone

The poor monk. His contribution will be duly noted and his family should probably be informed. Can someone call them? Oh, he had no family? Oh. Okay. That's cool, I guess.