I was in the middle of Main Street in Maine,
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I was in the middle of Main Street in Maine, which wasn't very main because in Maine, the main characteristic is being mainly mainstream Maine-empty. Confusingly I still got hit by
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the mainstream media's barrage of rubbish. The main thrust of their message being to maintain the status quo mainly for the maintenance of the wealthy. Without a second thought
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I thrust the bagel into the toaster, knowing full well it wasn't going to fit. I didn't care,I wasn't going to let mainstream media tell me how to toast my bread,to hell with them!
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The bagel WILL fit I mutter to myself as I continue to try and jam it into the toaster. a few regretful moments later,
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I was poking a knife foolishly into the toaster, trying to retrieve my inevitably jammed bagel. BANG! The shock killed me immediately. As my soul left my charred body, I wished
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I would get a Funeral Express funeral. I did! But my casket overnight air shipment at the FE hub got mistakenly put on a barge to the realm of Osiris, Iowa, and my soul was shipped
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to River Styx, Oregon. In three separate shipments no less! Once I put my soul back together, I called Funeral Express' customer service line. A woman with a raspy voice answered
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, "Funeral Express, this is Cloris speaking. How may I bury you?" "Yes, hello," I said, "I would like to make a complaint about how my body was handled and ask for my money back."
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Cloris was a ravishing redhead. Her Irish heritage was evident and she spoke Gaelic. Her older son Iain was a famous flautist.
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Her 3rd son, however, was at war with her only son and daughter. She laid all the blame on the Tuatha Dé Danann and their refusal to show up at Sterling and Bannockburne.
2
- Started
- 2016-11-04 01:29:59
- Finished
- 2017-08-28 02:35:15
5 Comments
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SlimWhitman Aug 28 2017 @ 16:48
Dhanithecat, your fold has nothing to do with the previous fold. The only thing left of the story is the name Cloris. This site is named Foldingstory because we are writing stories together. It is a collaborative project - respecting the previous writers intentions (most of the time) comes with the territory. I hope that you can keep that in mind in future folds. Thanks!
LordVacuity Aug 28 2017 @ 17:18
I think it works. I can see that as a choice that I have used many times myself. I do not even classify that anything close to derailment. I know I have caused a bunch of those, unintentionally of course.
LordVacuity Aug 28 2017 @ 17:19
In fact my fold is an example of this.
LordVacuity Aug 28 2017 @ 17:24
Earlier in the day I had been in a conversation about a woman who had 3 children, one of which was a girl, and then a mention of the 3rd brother. No body remembers ever seeing a 3rd brother and wouldn't that mean she had 4.
LordVacuity Aug 28 2017 @ 17:26
But she really does only have the three. No step-children, no foster children, no Children of God, no Children of the corn, forest, night, or even Now.