Number crunching, it looked like the company

Number crunching, it looked like the company could afford any of the options, but the

board would be difficult to persuade. It wasn't that they didn't want to make money, but they were paralyzed with many paths and too little information. They stared at me, begging

the question, "What the Hell is the Grimace character from McDonald's?" I didn't have the guts to tell the truth. No one knew, he was purple and gay and frankly, no one had

any idea what he was. He was simply Grimace, like Goofy is Goofy. To tell the truth, those characters undetermined species messed up my head when I was a child. To this day,

I still think that Liza Minelli is human. Too bad she doesn't warble out those old McDonald's commercials, "You deserrrrrrveee a breakkkkkkkkkkk toddddddaaaaaaaaay....

But it seemed that she wasn't even singing anymore. 25 years on and she was still flogging Mommy Dearest. Get over it, Honey. Lots of us have difficult parents. Take me, for

instance, my parents tried saving their love by a common hatred for animal rights that they tried enforcing on me

dung which I was forced to keep on the pillow next to my head, even during those humid, choking summer months. One July, during a heatwave, the smell got so bad that I had to

keep my head freshly shaven at all times for the cockroaches to have a cocktail hour while speed dating with honey suckle lamb shanks for dessert. The man coming around today.