So the parrot says. "Listen Doc, my last.."

  • So the parrot says. "Listen Doc, my last.." Oh sorry times up for the monologue. My first guest this evening is a sub-par looking actress with limited talent staring in a mediocre

  • made for TV movie. Please welcome the unexceptional Ronna DeMill." "Hi, Dick." "Tell us about your movie, Ronna." "It's called 'Fare to Middling,' about dumpy woman on a dreary bus

  • ." "Oh?" "Yes." "Tell us more, Ronna." "Well, OK, Dick. She's riding on this bus &then the bus stops. Everyone gets off except the boring lady. That's my character." "Fascinating."

  • "And then the little old lady - that's me - gets off, and seconds later the bus explodes." Ronna waited. Dick burst out laughing. "You're kidding, right?" "It's my first part in a

  • global terror scheme," said Ronna "Who would suspect the beans a li'l old lady offers the other passengers are treated with steroids? My next mission is to blow up a plane, Dick."

  • Where to hide the explosives was the big question. Ronna and Dick talked all night about how to pull that off. There were cameras everywhere and they were mostly invisible. Bummer!

  • We decided to hide the explosives in our hair. Ronna has an 80s style perm and Dick has a rainbow mohawk, so it won't be conspicuous at all. My job was to disable the cameras.

  • It wasn't until midway through the job that I realized I had no idea how to disable a camera. The bundle of C-4 in Ronna's perm was ready to go, but I was busy frantically

  • trying to figure out how after all that work on her perm, she just ignored her nasty-ass nails. 'Why not get a manicure too, Ronna?' I wondered as the shouts of guards rounded the

  • building and drifted our way. Cool as a cucumber Ronna looked me straight in the eyes and said: "Actually, I think I can get away with it."



  1. SlimWhitman May 03 2016 @ 17:59

    Not such a boring character after all...

  2. Magic May 04 2016 @ 01:19

    Ugh, I'm caught between giggling at this story and hating myself for my past/present tense grammar errors :(

  3. SlimWhitman May 08 2016 @ 16:45

    giggle and don't worry about perfect grammer, this is foldingstory!

  4. IceSquad May 08 2016 @ 17:46

    Please capitalize your openers, Slim. Oh, and I believe a semicolon is due after 'Giggle' ;) .

  5. SlimWhitman May 16 2016 @ 03:31

    @Icecube: OK! http://foldingstory.com/q8x05/

  6. Magic May 16 2016 @ 19:55

    @SlimWhitman Haha! Now it all makes sense!

  7. SlimWhitman May 16 2016 @ 20:03

    Didya get the >>>message? :-P

  8. Magic May 16 2016 @ 20:10

    ... the message that the apocalypse was yesterday? the message that semicolons should always be used in random places? :P

  9. SlimWhitman May 17 2016 @ 04:49

    Haha - ok. there is still a little twist to the story I started in response to IceSquad''s request that I guess was overlooked so far. Hint: it was directed at IceSquad...

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