This was Jeremy's first kickball tournament,

This was Jeremy's first kickball tournament, ever.

He'd been practicing his serve and his kick all week. Jeremy was stoked. That was until he saw who was the pitcher, Fast finger Freddie, kickball's meanest pitcher. Jeremy gulped

and then he contemplated quitting kickball and joining the clergy; changing his name from Jeremy to Slow Boner Benny...Fast Finger Freddie fired a high-riser toward his groin, and

no one knows his true reason behind those big changes he decided to start a new life for a very good reason

packing up the minivan, tossing out the kids toys, Vilma's make-up bag and Snooter's doggy chew. He was starting the van to head out when in the rear view mirror he spotted

the Bangtan Army at it again. They were mad. I immediately sped forward forgetting about everything. I tried to soothe myself with the radio but the only thing that played was BTS.

I wished with all my heart and soul that it was BTO, because then I would be...takin' care of business. If only life was at this moment so simple & humorous. The Bangtan Army was

not fragile, as they roll on down the highway, blowing up everything in sight. “Did you see that?” I shouted. “You ain’t seen nothing yet,” They shouted back. I just let it ride.

We arrived at 3800 W. Cortland just in time to see the locally manufactured tellies be given out as samples. We took one and it was to last 25 years. But at the time we were

unmodded naturals, among the last of that generation, and we had no idea how our attachment to external television would conflict with our desires to become distributed beings.