Marsh supermarkets would sell homogenized

Marsh supermarkets would sell homogenized milk with caps that said "HOMO" on top. I thought they were hilarious and collected a bunch of them – and kept them for 20 years before I

finally turned one upside down. "OWoh" it said. It was then and only then did I see the faintest image of Keanu Reeves behind the letters. He'd been upside down, commenting on

his uber-canadian-ness. You know, like Robert Goulet, hockey pucks, and not giggling when you say Regina properly. No, this wanna be needed a lesson, and I was teacher, eh.

So I took out the "razon sash" and said, "You are a beauty queen!" and whipped him in the face like a methed out monkey. I pulled his hair and said look at that,

look in the mirror! The Dark mark of

liver spots plague your visage. Forsooth, fair Gweneviere, thou art now old as all get out. Methinks I shall rethink my open ended proposal of betrothal. Prithee, forgive my

youthful romantic indulgence. Nay, I was but a lad when first I lay eyes upon thee. Alas, the years are unkind and so I take my leave. Fare thee well, Gweneviere! I do love nothing

more than to lay my eye upon your glorious face. But, alas, I am going, and thee, I will never see until my life has reached its end.

I have tried to win thy love and thy hand this race, but I fear that it is not I you really see. In afterlife I shall descend