Ernie heard a deafening crash. Snatching

... Ernie, puzzled, stopped & sniffed the bottom of his wingtips. Spam? The street was a mess. Why was the cement truck hauling Spam, he wondered, as he watched the wreckage ignite

in flames. Well this isn't going to end well for anyone. Ernie tried to run away, but his wingtips weren't cutting it. KABOOM! The truck exploded and that is how he lost his legs.

Bert was traumatized. Ernie was there in the middle of (wait for it) Sesame Street bleeding like a stuck Miss Piggy from the loss of his legs. Sooner or later Oscar was going to be

expecting their arrival at his home for dinner & dumpster diving. Then along came Count. Much to Bert's chagrin, he began ticking off the minutes 'til help for Ernie arrived.

Bert yelled at the Count, "Stop with the numbers you fool. Do something!" But the Count could do nothing. Ernie just lay there in his muppet, furry blood. Big Bird rubbernecked

back & forth stroking his beak say "I guess soon Earnie will join Mr. Looper in the big bird roost in the sky." Bert cried muppet tears. "Earnie, I've wanted to tell you something

for a long time." Bert collapsed into his friend's arms, and cried into his shoulder. "I'm gay"

"I'm happy for you, Bert!" His friend said, patting him on the back. "It's great to be happy!" "I mean homosexual." Bert said between sobs.

"Gee," said Ernie. "I know, thanks for your support" said Bert. "No, Bert, Gay begins with the letter G!" Bert knew it would be a long road...