This fold is dedicated to Mrs. McGurk and
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This fold is dedicated to Mrs. McGurk and her magic rolls.
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The next 8 folds are dedicated to Mrs. McGurk's dissolving marriage and the Atkins diet.
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Mrs. Jennifer McGurk was halfway through a quiz in a 1972 issue of Cosmopolitan snagged at a garage sale when she said, "I've had my fill of this turkey. I need beef and a salad."
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"Is that a euphemism, or are you actually hungry for steak?, Mr McGurk asked anxiously. His wife just looked at him disdainfully.
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"Harry, close your quotation marks," said Mrs. McGurk, "I can't tell if you're talking or telling the gol-durned story." "Mildred, you've gotten on my last nerve," he quavered, his
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thin veneer of calm cracking. He made a set of quick and dirty air quotes. "There! Ya happy, Mildred?" He squeezed past his wife to the garage. It was time for
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a couple of hours of self-flagellation followed by the sauna. Twenty three minutes in the sauna he heard a loud POP through the roof of the sauna so he ran out into the snow naked.
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The snow melted on his flushed skin and sent spirals of steam into the night sky, which thankfully concealed his junk. As he cooled down he looked around for the source of the POP.
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He ran to the Pool House hoping it wasn't locked. He didn't want to spend to much time in the snow, naked. It wasn't locked. There should be some robes he could fashion into warm
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mittens and things. There was. He tore them up and made booties, mittens, bunny ears & a penis sheath. He hopped out into the snow, nose twitching. His new life had finally begun.
7
- Started
- 2017-01-30 19:38:17
- Finished
- 2018-09-16 03:31:48
6 Comments
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Woab Sep 19 2018 @ 12:49
Poor Mrs. McGurk. Can her magic rolls save this marriage?
PurpleProf Sep 20 2018 @ 23:06
SO FUNNY!!!!!!!
SlimWhitman Oct 04 2018 @ 17:31
I came back and read it again. It even gets better on a second read, But did we ever discover what that loud POP was? Do we want to know? I'm not sure...
PurpleProf Oct 04 2018 @ 17:59
A weasel perhaps? Perhaps the robes he used were made of weasel pelts?
Gibber Oct 04 2018 @ 21:32
https://www3.uca.edu/iqzoo/Exhibits/popgun_pete.htm
Gibber Oct 04 2018 @ 22:07
"In 1955, the Brelands opened the IQ Zoo in Hot Springs, Arkansas. " I thought the IQ Zoo sounded familiar - I saw it as a kid on vacation. And now I live here. What are the odds of searching for "bunny with a popgun" and finding your home town?