Todo comenzó cuando regresé a la ciudad

Todo comenzó cuando regresé a la ciudad

And with a badda-bing badda-boom, I learned English. Perhaps this explains my sudden affinity for spray tans and cheese in a can.

I suppose I should really use some air quotes around the word English too. What I speak is really more of a pidgin street Engtalian. If you want a sandwich, no problem. But deeper

understanding of language can only be obtained by using L33T speak. Good grammar is for fools. The only language that is food of the gods is L33T speak. A new course will be

*ted 2day @ 2 l33t 4 1 n all c0m3 l3@rn & xpand your vocab we <3 U :)

"OU812" David Lee Roth smiled, that smug Indiana Jones smile at the multi-lipped alien. He was holding up his Album. The poly-labia Alien bowed in total reverence, so the prophecy

Of H.G.Wells was proven true. The Alien liked Van Halen and asked for tickets to their next gig. Problem was, none were scheduled yet. "Please email me, " the Alien asked.

"Why not now?" Van Halen asked. "It's now or never. Take it or leave it kid." He waited a minute then walked away. "No wait, please I can explain." But he was gone, and there

was naught but a single footprint to signify his presence. I wanted to go after him, but i knew better. Once he had made up his mind there was no going back. Van Halen was a stubbo

rn fool, and as much as I (secretly) admired him, I had my doubts about his decision this time. Running with the devil almost always turns out badly. Good-bye, my friend...