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I had given up trying to be an expert home

  • I had given up trying to be an expert home chef, but I couldn't give up the fix-it. So I found uses for some of my old items. Mustard seed make great temporary ball bearings. Meat
  • loaf made good cinder blocks for working on my car. When my transmission was shot, I used the mill from the pepper grinder. When I shifted, my car left a trail of sichuan pepper
  • which was sucked up through the exhaust. Full pepper blasts. My eyes puffed up. I couldn't see where I was driving. I slammed on the brakes and
  • realized that i slammed on the gas by accident! Then as, the smoke cleared, i found my self in a McDonald's Play Place and my lap was covered in Big Macs, Coke, and blood.
  • It took a sec for me 2 get out of the frenchfry haze I was in.OMG, the carnage! Hamburglar was halfway under the car, Birdie's leg was through the windshield, and there was 1 big
  • purple splotch all over the front windshield from what little was left from Grimace. On a good note, I didn't spill my shake and I clearly won the fight for the last McRib.
  • But when I got home that night, my wife took a good look at me &, wiping the blob of McRib sauce from the corner of my mouth, she asked, "You brought one home for me too, right?"
  • "Sorry babe, the Hamburglar stole the other McRibs." "I most certainly did NOT," said a voice from the bedroom. "Hamburglar, you're tearing us apart more than any pork sandwich!"
  • Hamburglar came down the stairs dressed in a negligee and nothing else. We ignored him. "I demand satisfaction!" he stated. "Tomorrow, at dawn, pistols or sword, your choice."
  • "Shamrock Shakes at dawn!" we chanted as one. Hamburglar grimaced, mumbled under his breath, then sought out Mayor McCheese to contest the choice of weapons. Ronald chortled.

6 Comments

  1. SlimWhitman Apr 08 2013 @ 15:57

    Is someone making money on the side for product placement? I want in on the action, mac!

  2. buddyboy4711 Apr 08 2013 @ 16:09

    "McRibs - so tender, they can be torn apart faster than an unfaithful relationship." Not the smoothest of slogans, but I do accept cash, Ghost of Ray Kroc.

  3. lucielucie Apr 08 2013 @ 16:51

    It took me a while and some googling for me to realise that Mayor McCheese and the rest were real. Well... you know what I mean.

  4. SlimWhitman Apr 08 2013 @ 17:51

    One way to build a story among collaborating writers in only 10 lines is to work in a known context. Its fun of course when someone comes from a different background and reinterprets things.

  5. Theepicone Apr 08 2013 @ 19:46

    That's where I come in! *evil laughter here*

  6. lucielucie Apr 09 2013 @ 02:36

    Ta v much, SlimWhitman, for saying my general cluelessness is 'reinterpretation' - you're a mate.

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