There once was a girl named Emily. She was

There once was a girl named Emily. She was in college and became frustrated during her reading class. You see, they were told to use technology and she just wasn't good with it.

She tried her hardest but just didn't understand. She insisted that she would just never learn. Emily became frustrated and began to cry.

"There, there, Emily," said a passerby. Emily glanced up from where she sat with her head forlornly buried in her arms. "Where, where?" Emily replied, tearfully. "Try, try again."

Tears shooting from her eyes, Emily rose in a rage, and so did some of the environs. "Have you ever considered that this is NOYDB?" The insensitive passerby who tried to "help"

said,"I consider your business my business as we're both part of mankind & the bell is tolling for thee." Emily was about to retort when a lamppost fell on the passerby's head, kil

ling the light. It was dark. Emily skittered across the 18th Century London alley. Dank smells, and roiling funks belched into the air. I had to catch that demonic woman.

Although I am but a man of the world, I have observed that being Blessed is not much of a blessing. Emily would be my test of this notion. I as the Blessed and she as my blessing.

We were to do this skit where we played customers at whole foods, buying $100 worth of food. We marvelled at the produce section and bought some vintage cucumbers. Then we got fish

Brian Dennehy sauce so they could just eat it up. This kinda weirded us out, so we decided to quit show business while we could still think straight. Brian Dennehy sauce indeed!