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Beeeep. The alarm clock startled me out of

  • Beeeep. The alarm clock startled me out of the bed and onto the floor. I groaned and groggily checked the time. 52 stars and a penny. It was far too early for me to fully function.
  • Ever since that man dropped a penny on me from atop the Empire State Building, I was seeing stars at all times. My alarm clock lacked the empathy of more advanced models and beeped
  • like a squad car speeding towards Dunkin Donuts at rush hour. My eyelids fluttered open. Glittering geometric shapes slowly expanded wherever I looked. Another migraine attack?
  • My perceptions were devolving at alarming rate. Trees were becoming green triangles, the pavement: a gray square, the sun: a yellow circle. My vision was going 8-bit.
  • Sure, there was Grandpa with his MS Paint art but I was crushed about the simplification of my eyesight. A few days later, though, as if in compensation, the soundfield expanded
  • my senses. The world now was literally a tie-dyed explosion of colors & sounds. Grandpa lost his hearing aids a while back, but when a blue & pink starburst erupted in the sky, I
  • decided I needed something stronger. I took dynamite, jammed it in a pepper spray tube with huge blobs of psilocybin marinated in peyote and injected it into my neck.
  • It was powerful trippy and I was encouraged to go stronger still. After some quick research on the deep web I decided on a ghost pepper / LSD / pop rocks / bath salts enema.
  • The Beatles wrote Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds. It would be an entirely different song if they had ghost pepper / LSD / pop rocks / bath salts enemas.
  • Lucy in the Sky with Stuff up her Bum would require different rhymes entirely. Bum rhymes with hum, dumb, thumb, scrotum and scrum. Here goes: "Picture yourself in a boat on a...
Started
2013-06-30 02:03:08
Finished
2014-12-29 06:24:27

6 Comments

  1. Avatar

    Chaz Dec 29 2014 @ 12:09

    Sorry lucielucie, I don't want to picture myself in that maritime situation. :)
  2. Avatar

    lucielucie Dec 29 2014 @ 14:21

    That's OK Chaz, you don't have to sacrifice everything for Art.
  3. Avatar

    zxvasdf Dec 29 2014 @ 14:41

    You're fortunate, Chaz, because I must. Picture yourself in a boat on diarrhea With corn corpses and intestinal folds Somebody calls you, you answer quite turgidly A girl of malodourous wolds Art came and went, shaking its head.
  4. Avatar

    lucielucie Dec 30 2014 @ 01:47

    Hmmm... It's Art, Jim, but not as we know it...
  5. Avatar

    zxvasdf Dec 30 2014 @ 11:28

    A little suffering is good for the soul.
  6. Avatar

    49erFaithful Dec 30 2014 @ 17:55

    And a little soul is delicious with suffering.

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