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He scoped out the sink, looked for towels

  • He scoped out the sink, looked for towels and found none. Using his cuff, he turned the faucet on &rinsed his hands. He dried himself inside his pockets and kicked open the door.

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  • Filthy. It's been said that 9 out of 10 people don't wash their hands after using the bathroom. He wasn't about to catch something horrible from this dive.

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  • Or so he thought. Barely 24 hours later he was bent double in agony, cursing the bowl of peanuts he had foolishly grazed on at Kaz Bar. His friends thought he was paranoid about

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  • the way he was wolfing down those peanuts. Granted, it had been a while since he'd last eaten, but he was shoving them in, shells and all, at an alarming rate.

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  • Sanjiv pitied the poor elephant. Clearly stolen from the zoo, Smedley was now forced to endorse a rather repulsive children's cereal. Sanjiv was determined to free him!

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  • but just then, sanc, sanj, however u pronounce that experienced a phenomenon called spontaneous combustion. The dude (what else am i gonna call him?)was a smoldering corapse

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  • and when the flames died down from the burning, his eyes opened. He dragged his melted body to a Good Will. He needed a "Duster" and a read and green sweater. Then he saw a glove

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  • that was also kinda melty, which reminded him how hungry he was. His favorite sanck had always been grilled cheese sandwiches with extra melty cheese. How ironic, now that he felt

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  • that it had been a mistake to patch the holes in his shoes with Swiss Cheese slices. No he wasn't sure if his feet really stunk or it was the cheese. He would find out when made

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  • -to-fit insoles would get replaced. Ever since the conglomerate started marketing Dr. Scholl's / Sorrento's parmesan cheese and foot powder it was difficult to tell the difference

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