The freakin' snow was up to my crotch, not

The freakin' snow was up to my crotch, not that I minded the stimulation, but I needed to get to the meet her. She had left a chat on my phone and I was intrigued. All it said

Was I prefered blonds and it was on. She flooked back and smiled. She reached for the handle and flushed. Beauty is as beauty does. Brushed her hands on her thighs and waked past t

om Arnold at the Laugh Shack. Tom was licking a urinal cake because he thought it was a chunk of coke. This was the closest she'd been to someone famous and she said

in a hushed voice..."I can be your Roseanne..." Tom thought for a moment. He certainly needed to hitch his star onto another actress who would use neptism to get him employment.

This is when Tom realized he was dreaming. Who even THINKS "hitch his star" and "use nepotism"? Certainly not T Arnold! So he started looking for something for fantasy sex.

"Poodle? Nahhh. Who am I, James Marsters? I could try a pool of jello. Need to buy jello, though. Oh hell, let me just read some porn," Tom griped. Instead, he watched The Stupids.

He switched channels and The Vampire Slayer was on...Buffy was kissing Spyke,or William The Bloody played by James Marsters.

Buffy herself was being played by Miley Ray Cyrus, and the part of the wolf was played by an accordion. He sighed. The RandomPop Network had really gone downhill lately. Next chan

-ge of scene and without warning three million monks parachuted onto Buffy (played by Miley Cyrus) and began to lecture her on the ethics of car repairs. But that was not all they

lectured her on. Her haircut wasn't exactly holy, and they told her just that. "You....you look like Draco Malfoy!" one of them accused. Miley (Buffy) crossed her arms defensively