Her blonde hair. It was all my eyes decided

Her blonde hair. It was all my eyes decided to look at, despite thousands of other things in the restaurant.

She walks up to me and says hi. I tilt my head to the side and take in her features. She didn't look real. She was perfect.

Well, except for the eyestalks, but that's neither here nor there. I took her to dinner, but tragedy struck when I found her body doesn't react well to salt.

Thinking fast, I threw my glass of water into her face. Her eyestalks gazed up at me with appreciation. "You saved my life!" she murmured. "Stay away from the nachos next time, " I

gave her my unsolicited opinion, to which she gave me a feigned nod of gratitude. In crustacean society, displaying self-importance is the quickest way to a pot of boiling water.

Now, you might be the kind of crustacean that is all into that pot of boiling water lifestyle; more power to you. I and most of my crustacean kind are really not into that scene.

I take a different stance; a different perspective. The boiling water undulates and draws me to it, yet I can only step to the side. A bubble pops. A world is born.

Then Henry enters. “Why in hell are you watching bubbles pop in boiling water?” he asks incredulously. “Go weed the garden, dumb ass!” Christ, was I pissed! I picked up the pot of

boiling water and carried it with me into the garden. You're the only ones who understand me I whispered to the angry bubbles as the asteroid slowly approached.