"Hello and thank you for purchasing the Orgreenic
- "Hello and thank you for purchasing the Orgreenic Zero Point Energy Stove and Slushee Machine. To get maximum satisfaction from this product, please follow these instructions with
- care or your warranty for the stove and slushee machine will be null and void. 1) Do not operate machine unless wearing a purple hat 2) Only use machine during a full moon 3) Keep
- these stove/slushee machine instructions in a safe place. So safe that not even you can find them again. 4) If the stove doesn't work, don't worry about it. You shouldn't be eating
- . You're fat. 5) I love you, I just bloody love you. 6) if you think the stove/ slushed machine is out to get you, call an ambulance. 7) The slushed attachment will not work when
- little Hans tries to vacuum that cat with it,so do your best to keep those two apart. 8) Take the chili out of the freezer no later than 11 &, finally 10) No pornography while I'm
- cooking bacon. 11) Let the dog win tug-o-war. 12) Don't eat the entire gallon of mint chocolate chip. 13) Kiss auntie Gloria on the lips! 15) When I get back open up the
- secret compartment where I hide #14. 16) Do #14. 14) Set more reasonable goals, who are you kidding? 15) Jump to #17, you've done this one already 17) Don't eat all the sugar-free
- stuff, fake sugar is bad for you. 18) Wash your yoga mat, for pete's sake. 19) Do one thing everyday that scares you. 20) You know you skipped 2 and 11. 21) Don't stand so clos
- e to me with your breathing, (yeash.) 22) Take the time to smell the roses and read the tabloids in the grocery lane. (Let 'em wait!) 23) If you lost the lottery,
- you'll find it the last place you look (I was a fool). 24) It takes wings on a unicorn to jump a shark (hoo boy). 25) Never count your folds before they finish (the end).
- Started
- 2013-02-27 21:22:26
- Finished
- 2013-03-29 00:24:42
7 Comments
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lucielucie Mar 29 2013 @ 03:28
My Mussolini Spelling Ap strikes again - how is slushee not in the ipad dictionary? I could always read my folds before posting, but that's a step too far.
49erFaithful Mar 29 2013 @ 09:33
Just play it off as another charming British language tweak. "Fancy another cherry slushed old chap?"
lucielucie Mar 29 2013 @ 11:04
Right Ho!
inatick Mar 29 2013 @ 11:22
quaint... What is British language?
lucielucie Mar 29 2013 @ 11:28
I don't know. It might have something to do with jam.
49erFaithful Mar 29 2013 @ 11:39
That, and lots of blood.
lucielucie Mar 29 2013 @ 18:02
I find the writing style of the Americans on the site quite exotic, so it goes both ways I suppose.