I was walking after school suddenly, i

surprised when I arrived home and walked into the kitchen. The calendar on the wall showed July, but it was really December. "How odd,"

I sighed. I flipped the calendar to Dec. It flipped back to July. This was not good. I tore it off the wall. It flapped vigorously, avoided a stupid pun, and perched on the fridge.

I reflected on my poor diary management skills and enrolled on a course run by Europol in a warehouse in Lille. I set traps for my calendar and stuffed it in my case, slamming it

as hard as I possibly could in an attempt to break it.

Who it was and what he was breaking got lost in the wild melee of the moment. It was only the next morning, that Archie woke under a coffee table with the taste of burnt popcorn in

his mouth. How exactly had he gotten here? And why was he wearing swimming trunks? While mulling this over under someone's coffee table, he was interrupted rudely by a kernel of tr

Iple cheese popcorn that wandered away. Mr. Popcorn was looking for his family, who had already been eaten. Mrs. Popcorn found him and all was well under the table. Chocolate kings

ordained that Mr. and Mrs. Popcorn were suspect and no longer wanted in Under-the-Table Land, since their children had gone missing under questionable circumstances.

"Can we take some of the gum and boogers from Under-the-Table Land," asked Mr. Popcorn, "to feed our missing questions?" They were told no and their missing questions starved.