The travelling merchant stopped outside the

The travelling merchant stopped outside the castle gates, "Can I interest you in our Jolly Products? Perhaps Your Majesty would like to sample my newest 'Royal Phat Beats' BBQ sauc

e?" The guard eyed the salesman with suspicion. But he was famished so he allowed a sample to be passed thru. "Hotdamn! That tastes like tic tic chewachewa followed by that bump!"

"I'm sorry, I don't speak jive." said the salesman. But he could tell by the look on the man's face that he was utterly satisfied, and that it would soon be another successful sale

-s man that he had successfully turned into an unsuccessful sales man. That was his job. Ever since his mom ran off with a used car sales man, he went around wrecking sales careers

work to be had, so I nap on the couch with the TV on. As I nod off during My Little Pony, I distinctly hear one pony say to another, "Would you ever eat a fish?" I open an eye.

Nobody was there. I must've been dreaming. I closed my eyes. "Would you eat a fish in a dish with a knish?" My eyes opened. A fuzzy green figure sat perched nearby at the foot of

my bed. The Grinch! He held out the dish of fish-n-knish to me. "No green eggs & ham?" I asked. "And where is Sam?" The Grinch's eyes narrowed. "I am Sam. Sam I am." I couldn't

believe him as Sam is quite yellow, and not at all a Grinchy sort of fellow. "Well I don't care for fish, so I suggest, you bring another dish, I'd more readily digest." The Grinch

chortled heartily- rather odd, as his heart was supposedly all shriveled and black. I complied reluctantly, bringing him all my family's crops. We would starve this winter.