Even she knew when we put the bookshelf together,

Even she knew when we put the bookshelf together, that Twilght would go onto the shelf of shame on the lower right corner. It was ok to admit you read it, but never to put it next

to grandma's ashes. That's just tacky, like the time she wore a pink terry cloth tube top, you know - the one with snags, and flip-flops and cut off daisy dukes to Aunt Martha's

Vineyard. The sales contract contained a provision that allowed Anna Nicole Smith's relatives to graze freely. The Developers bought it. Every year the blue-bloods get tanked

and the Clampetts take over the country club -- hog jowls, in-bred relatives, coon dogs and all. The tse-tse fly ointment that oozed out of the tube left an odor similar to

Sleepy Time Celestial Seasonings. Ellie Maye, of course, was a knock out. But Jethrine was like a roundhouse to the temple.

A temple filled with pythons, of course, for Jetherine was the 60s precursor of the tranny. Oh sure, it was comedy, all right. It was also subversive and titillating. My god, man,

haven't you ever danced with the devil in the pale moonlight?! Locked tongues with the occasional he/she?! Gone in search of some strange?! No?! Me neither. But you have to admit

it sounds more exciting than a normal day of get up, go to work, go home, go online, get the tissues then go to bed. If only I could free myself of

this unhealthy porn addiction, perhaps I could wean myself off with Cosmopolitan and then down to lads mags. Or if I can distract myself enough during the day I won't notice...