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"Latin is a dead language," Maurice said.

  • "Latin is a dead language," Maurice said. Lewis replied, "No, YOU'RE the dead language." Then he offered him a drink. Maurice, in his naivety, drank the liquid. He suffered and di

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  • d absolutely all the tiring and draining things that only an academic could do. Maurice was like that. Melba toast. Footnotes. Sweaters. He actually caused an entire wedding to

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  • stop for nearly three hours when he decided the groom needed a shower...yeah, not a pretty sight. I could have lived with his skin peeling off from whatever Maurice

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  • Put on it as a salve. The induction ceremony went on, regardless, and the groom was delayed. The social justice warriors said the groom was to sacrificed for the gorilla because

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  • it was time for some affirmative action to reninstate gender balance on the whole sacrifice-the-virigin-to-the-gorilla social more. The social justice warriors tied the groom to a

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  • A Shrewdness of – Apes. Darwin, dare win this battle of the Genes.

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  • I was once evolving just like you are now but i put an end to that nonsense by putting my foot down. Not on a tree but on the ground. With the help of a friend, I put my mind in a

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  • sling and spent the rest of my life producing nothing but beautiful thoughts. I did not further the economy. I did not further mankind. I did not further myself to work. But I was

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  • sought after, so much so that I eventually found a nice perch on the highest peak in the Himalayans where the bewildered would come sit at my feet & listen to me talking to myself.

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  • Some ascended that mountain for the aroma of my feet, some to be purified by my nonsensical babbling, others for the shocking existential disappointment. But all left transformed.

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